Back to my Discordian home pageThis first section of the cookbook consists entirely of recipes made using the head of J. Calvin "Bimp" Smith. While Bimp may not, in fact, be an anarchist, these recipes are all tasty and merit inclusion in this cookbook.
Bimp's Head with Hamster
Bimp's Head with Whiskey
Bimp's Head with Cabbage
Bimp's Head GUAMBO
Mimi's Stuffed Bimp's Head
Bimp's Head with Quick Mushroom Ragu
Old Fashioned Turkey Style Bimp's Head
From: "Tom S." <schatz1@ix.netcom.com>
1 Bimp's head
1 bottle of catsup
5 pounds of crushed clove
1 rabid hamster
1 unabridged dictionary
1 telephone
1 or 2 batches of intoxicating substances
No clothes
Cover head in catsup, roll vigorously in crushed clove (you or the head, doesn't matter). Feed head to rabid hamster. Kill said hamster with unabridged dictionary. Order pizza. While waiting for pizza get really really drunk and/or stoned. When pizza comes answer door naked. Invite pizza person in for good time.
From: Ares <ares@wineasy.se>
Take head.
Get whiskey.
Pour lots of whiskey into a big bowl.
Throw head away.
Drink whiskey.
(repeat until necessary)
From: Hal Phillips <bocko@webspan.net>
Seasoning Mix
1 tablespoon plus 1 teaspoon salt
1 tablespoon plus 1 teaspoon sugar
1 tablespoon onion powder
2 1/2 teaspoons ground ginger
2 teaspoons garlic powder
2 teaspoons grated lemon peel
2 teaspoons grated lime peel
1 teaspoon white pepper
3/4 teaspoon ground cardamom
3/4 teaspoon ground cinnamon
3/4 teaspoon ground nutmeg
3/4 teaspoon ground savory
1/2 teaspoon ground allspice
1/2 teaspoon black pepper
1/2 teaspoon ground dried habanero chile peppers
3 bay leaves
2 tablespoons all-purpose flour
3 cups Bimp's Head blood, in all
1 (3 to 4 pound) Bimp's Head, cut into 8 pieces
2 tablespoons vegetable oil
1 cup chopped onions
6 cups chopped cabbage (about 1 small head), in all
1 1/2 cups chopped green bell peppers
1 1/2 cups chopped red bell peppers
2 tablespoons chopped fresh cilantro
1/4 cup balsamic vinegar
1 tablespoon soy sauce
Combine the seasoning mix ingredients in a small bowl. Dissolve the flour in 1/4 cup of the blood and set aside. Sprinkle the head evenly with half of the seasoning mix and rub it in well.
Heat the oil in a heavy 5-quart pot over high heat just until it begins to smoke, about 4 minutes. Add the seasoned head in batches, large pieces first and skin sides down first, and brown about 2 to 3 minutes per side. Remove the head from the pot and set it aside.
Add the onions and 3 cups of the cabbage to the pot and cook, stirring and scraping frequently, until the onions start to brown, about 4 minutes. Add all the bell peppers, the cilantro, vinegar, soy sauce, remaining seasoning mix, and flour-blood mixture. Cook, stirring almost constantly, until the mixture comes to a boil, about 2 minutes, then add the remaining cabbage and the remaining blood. Return the head and the accumulated juices to the pot. Bring to a boil, reduce the heat to low, and simmer until the head is tender, about 30 minutes. Serve immediately.
From: J. Calvin (Bimp) Smith <bimp@ix.netcom.com>
1 Bimp's Head
1 large Onion, chopped
1 cup Olive Oil
1/2 cup Flour
3 or 4 Hundred Discordians
Polish the Bimp's Head until it is smooth and expands slightly. Cover it and the Discordians with the Olive Oil and Flour; add more oil if necessary, and forget the flour entirely if you so desire. Paint the Onion gold and engrave ITSILLAK on it, allowing the Discordians to inhale the fumes deeply. Then allow nature to take its course. This recipe for Great Underground Annual Masked Ball and Orgy may serve thousands before it is all over.
From: Tzimon Yliaster <tzimon@crl.com>
This recipe makes 5 servings.
1 medium Bimp's head
2 cloves crushed garlic
1 bay leaf
1 cup chopped hedgehog
2 medium green peppers
3 small tomatoes
1 heaping tsp. basil
1/4 tsp. tarragon
1/4 tsp. oregano
1/4 tsp. thornapple
2 cups ricotta cheese
1/2 cup grated parmesan
1 cup black ants
salt and pepper to taste
olive oil for saute (about 6 tbs.)
Slice Bimp's head in half lengthwise, and bake the halves face-down on an oiled tray at 350 deg. for 20-25 minutes. Scoop out the insides and mince them.
Saute Bimp's head insides with the hedgehog, garlic, bay leaf and peppers until hedgehog is clear. Combine with everything except half the parmesan cheese and the black ants. Let stand 20 minutes, then drain off all the excess liquids.
Stuff Bimp's skull. Top with combined black ants and remaining parmesan.
Bake in 350 deg. oven for 35-40 minutes, uncovered.
Serve hot.
From: Hal Phillips <bocko@webspan.net>
3 tablespoons olive oil
1/2 pound fresh mushrooms (preferably portobello, shiitake, or crimini),
stemmed, and caps thinly sliced
1 tablespoon kosher salt, plus extra for seasoning
Freshly ground black pepper
1 clove garlic, pressed or finely minced
3 cups fresh tomato sauce
1 pound dry Bimp's Head
Freshly grated Parmesan cheese
Heat the oil in a medium-size skillet over medium-high heat. Add the mushrooms; season with salt and pepper to taste. Cook, stirring gently, until the mushrooms are tender, 7 to 10 minutes. Add the garlic; cook 1 minute longer. Add the tomato sauce; cook 5 minutes to combine the flavors.
Meanwhile, bring a large pot of water to a rolling boil over high heat. Add the tablespoon of salt and the Bimp head. Cook, stirring occasionally, until the head is tender but firm, al dente, 7 to 10 minutes. Drain; transfer to individual preheated serving bowls. Top each serving with 1/2 to 1 cup of the sauce. Serve with Parmesan.
Yummy...
From: Ayla <ayla@sprintmail.com>
1 11-pound Bimp's Head
1 cup salt
1 gallon water
1/2 cup olive oil
1 tsp each of paprika, salt, and pepper
1 package of your favorite stuffing, prepared but not cooked
Thaw Bimp's Head, and remove giblets. Combine salt and water in large pot or sink, and soak Bimp's Head and giblets for 8 hours. Remove Bimp's Head from water, rinse, and pat dry with paper towel. Mix paprika, salt, and pepper together. Thorougly massage Bimp's Head inside and out with mixture, then wrap tightly and place back in refrigerator for at least 2 hours, preferably overnight. Fry giblets, slice, and add to your stuffing.
Preheat oven to 425 degrees. Remove Bimp's Head from refridgerator and massage thorougly with olive oil, inside and out. Stuff Bimp's Head and sew opening shut. Wrap extra stuffing in aluminum foil and place with Bimp's Head in roasting pan with 1/2 inch of plain water. Cover with aluminum foil or lid. Bake at 425 degrees for one hour, then reduce heat to 325 degrees. Bake for another 4 hours, basting with liquid in the bottom of the pan every half-hour.
Remove Bimp's Head from oven and allow to sit for 20 minutes before carving. Serves 6, with leftovers.
(BTW, this also makes a really nice recipe for turkey. Happy Holidays.)
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